KKK moronWhy, you ask? From a blog on Nintendo at About.com:

“Dr. Kimberly Thompson of Harvard University supposedly found during an independent analysis that the ESRB didn’t identify all violence. Of course, this is a matter of opinion based on what is considered “violence.” This problem is addressed in section 2’s, “Understanding Video Game Research.” The same study found that Pac-Man is “64%” violent“

That’s right. Pac-man. I guess I see their point. I mean, what is Pac-man except a cynically-designed MMO where a vicious killer runs around murdering little dots and being repeatedly ganked by the Ghosts, a pre-Trammel UO guild. Once in awhile, Pac-man picks up some temporary, epic loot, and the Ghosts turn the same color (blue), indicating that Pac-man is engaging in racially-motivated violence when he so viciously slaughters them in retaliation for previous ganking. Do you avert your eyes like I do, briefly, whenever there’s a murder in Pac-man? The deaths in Pac-man are so horrifyingly realistic and soul-staining that I have nightmares for days after playing in the arcade. Don’t even get me started on the rape metaphor in Ms. Pac-man.

Man, in fact, it kind of makes me wonder: Is Pac-man really just a thinly veiled attempt to legitimize genocide by ensuring that the only time Pac-man can slaughter his enemies is when they’re all the same color? We need a Congressional inquiry. Hate-crimes are federal crimes and if this is the kind of thing Pac-man is encouraging, then we need immediate action on this from our elected representatives. Someone call Jack Thompson and get Hillary on the line!